#So it's just like..uh well...GENERALLY speaking.. everyone is uh.. on a personal quest..vaguely.. which takes place in a Market street full

[icewindandboringhorror]

One of the interesting bits of trying to resume working on the game after so long is looking back at my ancient Draft Placeholder versions of an image from 4 yrs ago trying to remember what the hell I meant back then, to hopefully interpret it into some more final (ish..) form of the same thing .. making slow progress lol

[jimmythejiver]

For the first time in a long time I went to the movies in forever and then to Target. At Target I see some Godiva bars on discount yellow tags and I was ecstatic until I read 70% Cacao, Dark, Salted Caramel and was deflated.

Anyway that's how I felt about seeing The Green Knight. What you thought this was about chocolate?

No see since the pandemic I've been back on my perennial King Arthur kick. I've for a long time since I was a young preteen thought, someday I too will write my own King Arthur epic and it'll be gay, magical, gangster and culty too, but for now I'll make up my own stories for practice and then with every story I got attached too, it got too involved and convoluted to the point that when it came down to actually writing a novel, I threw it all away and made a space opera I only planned in two weeks and wrote in a month. Anyway...so now I've been writing this very gay, magical, gangster and culty take on Final Fantasy XV with my boyfriend and just fell in love with Somnus Lucis Caelum who nobody has any insight about him than to make him the Mordred to Ardyn's Arthur, which is a strange flex, but okay, I thought about what if I wrote a Dark Age prequel about Ardyn and Somnus, but Ardyn becomes king and Somnus his shogun and they play games of seduction and power because I'm twisted like that. Anyway...I was like I'm never going to write this and I have to keep making up characters based on FFXV characters and King Arthur tropes because there's not a lot of stories that take place during the Dark Ages, it's always some Roman Empire story, or High Middle Ages and FFXV gave no room for either society to happen after the fall of Solheim and the rise of King Somnus...so we left with Dark Ages, y'all, the King Arthur comparisons are obvious, but Ardyn is no Arthur and Somnus is no Mordred, Aera is only Guenevere if you make up an affair with Somnus, Gilgamesh is no Bedwyr/Bedivere, but uh...they both amputees and the oldest companions to their respective kings so...I guess. Anyway making an ancestor of Cor Leonis and deciding well he's Owain/Yvain, or am Ignis type as idk Sir Cai/Kay I guess, they both cook, but Cai's more like Seifer Almasy than any FF character... Anyway I'm losing people.

My plan was to just scrap the FFXV prequel, leave my Somnus ideas into Overtime (a gangster and gods story) and just plan an actual King Arthur adaptation. I'd have King Arthur the treasure hunter, leader of a warband turned founder of Camelot who fights giants, giant cats and dogheads, but also fights King Claudas of the Franks and King Aelle of the Saxons and Cerdic a Briton who puts in his lot with the Saxons, etc. It'd been a a glorified turf war, meanwhile Arthur's gotta make alliances with King Pelles, The Fisher King and his strange cult he's founded because, why yes I find the ends justifies the means prophecy of the Holy Grail Quest very culty because Christianity then does not resemble it now. Meanwhile you got the secondary plots of Mordred, Gawain, Lancelot, Percival, Tristam and other's going on because they matter and too many modern King Arthur stories sideline the knights.

So many have always sidelined Mordred as a final boss eldritch abomination in mortal flesh conceived of sin and give him no personality, or complex motives, or even just a relationship with Arthur. I also have noticed the general sidelining of Lancelot, or give him a chad villain upgrade if you must include him at all, and the villainizing of Gawain to the point that you don't even have to have Mordred, or Agravain as a catalyst shit stirrer in court, just slap Gawain's name on Liam Neeson in a top knot and you're good. Mordred can just be a child offscreen until last act...fuck that, while Morgan Le Fay can either be a villainess plotting her cabal through men, or a well-intentioned, ineffectual idiot. Fuck that.

Now Hollywood just be doing King Arthur first acts that suck ass, only for said director to get rewarded failing upwards by giving this same jerk the Aladdin remake. The tonally shitty, crammed in blockbuster mess of a cliche heroe's journey that sucks.

With that background I was excited for The Green Knight. I read an illustrative version as a kid, I read Tolkien's translation as a teenager, I read Simon Armitage's superior, but with liberties taken translation. I was prepped to go knowing that indie, or not they were going to make changes to weave the disjointed poem together. I'm excited that because this movie exists Project Guternberg's finally thrown Jessie Weston's prose rendition up on their website. I'll be reading that at some point when this blows over.

The movie adaptation makes a lot of...choices, many I wouldn't love, but would forgive had their been a payoff. There was none.

The journey was fine, the cinematography was a breath of fresh air after crappy slo mo, glossy action scenes ruined another. Guys, I don't think I want to see a Zack Snyder Excalibur, it'll marginally be better than Guy Ritchie, but that ain't saying anything. Leave Excalibur to the post-Star Wars 80s where it is impeccable for it's time. I liked Green Knight's breathable pacing, it's color palette's in the forests and mountains made up for the muddy grey of every Ridley Scott send up in the castles and villages in every other Dark Ages/Medieval story in the last I don’t know since the shitty 00′s. For all the dark tones when there was blues, greens, yellows or reds, they were vibrant in this movie to contrast the gloom of Britain. The soundtrack was good. This isn't all what makes a movie, but it enhances it so let's get to the story and what I did and didn't like.

Things I Liked: Gawain is still a novice in his career The Costume Dressing Everyone pronounces Gawain's name different. I pronounce it like Gwayne, or Guh Wayne, but here you got Gowen (like Owen), Gowan (like Rowan), or even Garlon who I'm pretty sure is the Fisher King's heir in some versions of that Arthurian story, so uh... The reference to Arthur slaying 960 men with his bare hands (Nennius for the win!) The Waste Land that is implied to be a site of a battle (an important aspect of the Arthurian landscape) The Fox companion No long grisly, drawn out hunting scenes. The Fox lives! No misogynist speeches

Things I'm Mixed: This being a dream, is the magic real? Are the giants? Is the Green Knight a figment of Gawain's imagination from a spell Morgan casted in him to hallucinate? Is Lord and Lady also figments? It's...a way to interpret the poem, but lazy and I don't see why it's got to all fantasy, or all dream...this movie makes it too vague you're stuck picking one camp than to accept it's a fantasy with dream and hallucinatory sequences.

Things I'm Meh: Morgan Le Fay as Gawain's mom. Look I fucking hate Morgause as a character and these two get merged and steal each other's aspects so much at this point the difference is who did they marry, King Urien or King Lot? Both are attributed to being Mordred's mom, Mordred is Gawain's brother...both practice magic depending on certain incarnations, both love and hate Arthur their brother and are in conflict with him. Saint Winifred. I actually liked this sequence, but I don't appreciate her as the tacked on wife in the later dream sequence as like...a contrast between the wife you should marry than the whore next door you don't respect anyway? I don't even know what lesson I'm supposed to get out of the damn dream sequence, or any of it? That Gawain should've married his girlfriend and then he'd be a just ruler? That he shouldn't be king? That he'd never have to make the same heartless, impartial choices? I don't know, he seemed like a king doing king shit because guess what? It never gets easier. Wars will be waged. The world didn't become better because he married the right woman, respected her and lived in obscurity. The world didn't become better because he made her his queen. We certainly don't know the world would be better Gawain had his head chopped off and dead XP They never reveal the Lord and the Green Knight as one and the same because of this shit.

Things I Hated: Arthur withdraws from the challenge because he's old. In poem he takes it on and Gawain takes it so he don't have to and he finds himself more disposable than the king. Gawain only takes the challenge because of arrogance. Arthur and Gawain had no prior personal relationship. I'd not have hated this so much if it wasn't compounded by it cancelling out the first two things. Gawain is portrayed as having no respect for his woman, or any woman, maybe his mother? He has to be pushed by Winifred to regain her head. Gawain is portrayed as arrogant, covetous and ready to pass the buck, or the bare minimum than have any honor or decency. It didn't matter the kid in the wasteland was shithead bandit, the way Gawain acted towards him, when he gets robbed, it almost feels like he deserved it and Gawain doesn't learn a damn lesson. I'll admit him taking the sword to cut his ropes and cutting his hands was a neat sequence, it shows him go from stupid, to almost clever and having will to survive...you know traits he had in the poem, but he stops showing these traits or growing. Basically Gawain has to be dragged kicking and screaming to help people and shows no fortitude when facing temptation, or when showing respect towards others, it's exhausting. You don't make this kind of journey story without character growth. Why are you skipping this? Also is it just me, or is this like when you take Frank Miller Batman and transport him onto a Bill Finger story? This is at best Thomas Malory Gawain (and this is charitable) transported on the earlier Pearl Poet's story. Stop it. It's not tonally correct and goes at odds with the story and the set up characterization you'd need to tell it. Speaking of which, you know how I get through the oof... of Liam Neeson Gawain in Excalibur? By pretending he Agravain instead. Here...I don't even think Gawain could pass as Mordred in spite of his covetous nature, lust and entitlement. Why? because I don't think even Mordred is this dumb to warrant this hubris. Essel being invented as a tacked on love interest just to be shit on utterly and for what? I don't think I have much commentary here as there is no Essel I'm aware of to compare, or stack up. I just notice this trope of like...usually if you include a sex worker in Hollywood she often has a heart of gold, she often has her own sense of values that goes at odds with society, but is more true and less hypocritical than a privileged lady’s. I thought that's what they would've done with the added trope of back at home sweetheart to contrast and pit her against the despicable femme fatale of Lady Bertilak and her adultery and her ladyship...and I'm glad they didn't...but you did nothing with Essel than to shit on her for existing when you made her exist, you know. Lady Bertilak being portrayed as the seductress devil incarnate. Look I know adultery is a touchy taboo, but uh her and Gawain hit it off in the poem, dammit! Her values and his values come to clash, but here it's played off as Gawain is stupid and covetous and Lady Bertilak wants to prove something because...? If my brother's theory that she's a figment of Morgan Le Fay's magic, then I'll take this as a lesson of Gawain is impulsive and covetous and his mom knows it, but he don't want to fuck his mom, but he wants her power, and Morgan wants to teach him a lesson... I guess. Hey we don't have misogynist speeches in this movie, but we'll make sure to have the movie drip with it with no point, or commentary. Pass. Lord guilting, extracting and initiating the same sex kiss and only once. Poem automatically better that Gawain don't have to keep being reminded to keep his part of the bargain and he does it willingly more than once. What he doesn't do is give up his belt...gods how did we get more homophobic as a society that the homoeroticism here is worse? Catholics of the middle ages officially had no issue doing same sex, passionate kissing until it lead to sex. The Ending: The gods damn ending. In the movie as is, Gawain waits to uphold his end of the bargain and get his head chopped off. He imagines, even though we don't get any fuzzy or distortion to indicate this is a dream, but I already knew this was coming, he runs away and comes home, is regarded a hero, he sees his lady, takes her from behind and if you saw Brokeback Mountain (I didn't, but DJ has) you know this is a sign of disrespect to women. He gets her knocked up, pays her off for the kid she wants to keep, he is crowned king, marries the ghostly saint lady he helped retrieve her head earlier from a lake in the movie (this right here is the damn tip off). There's no more dialogue by this point and everything is montaging, so you know by now it's a dream, though nothing is out of focus. He rules as a heartless king, his whore son dies from war he waged, he has a daughter, his wife dies. Gawain then takes off the belt that would've saved his life and his head falls off. This would've been the one good twist, except... In this sequence of events he never had his head cut off so uh... now we back in present day. He decides not to bitch out, Green Knight in a sexy way is like "now off with your head," movie cuts to credits with no resolve...uh what the fuck? What the fuck? This is not good. You wasted the one twist in your dream when idk, you could've...

How I'd fix it: No dream sequence at all. No Incident At Owl Creek twist. Gawain comes home a hero and survivor of this game and ordeal. He wears this belt of shame. He becomes a well-renowned knight, but he bears a shame. One day he goes to take off his belt and his head falls off because he cheated to get this belt and to survive this encounter. There. Done. Improved your high concept movie that couldn't play any of the lessons straight from the damn poem without making everyone an asshole for no reason! Ugh! But nope you had to end it on we don’t know if Gawain lives or dies...because...it's dream magic made from his momma's witchcraft...?

Last Thoughts So then post-credits scene because Marvel because Pirates Of The Caribbean existed. A white girl who looks nothing like Gawain's daughter we see who didn’t pay off, or any child I can remember through this whole movie picks up King Arthur's crown that dream Gawain inherited and puts it on her head. Who is this girl? Are we gonna have an indie equivalent of of the Marvel Movie Universe/Universal Horror Monsters thing with ancient British legends? We gonna get a Life Of Saint Patrick next that crosses over? I don't know. What is this?

[thebibliomancer]

Tides of the Dark Crystal liveblog pt 22

Tides of the Dark Crystal because Amri just got pulled into the water, perhaps by some manner of white whale but probably not.

Last times on book: Amri and co are on a quest to unite all the Gelfling against the Skeksis. They’ve succeeded with the Sifa at Cera-Na and the Dousan of the Wellspring but while they were avoiding ever going to Ha’rar, All-Maudra Mayrin was killed by the Skeksis. Her daughter Seladon has become the new All-Maudra and spoke out in favor of loyalty to the Skeksis. In Ha’rar, the protagonists run into Tae of the Sifa and regrouped with her. While they were supposed to be sleeping on the problem, Amri instead fell off a boat because he heard a sea monster.

Chapter 22

Amri meets a new friend, unless he doesn’t, and then has an epiphany after getting friendly with a city street

So Amri is not drowning for the second time in the book despite being in some deep water. The first time it was because Naia was there sharing oxygen with him. This second time he’s just not drowning for some reason. He ponders aloud if he’s dead.

The creature he saw in the water is swimming around him, not giving him a good look, but untangling the rope that Amri tangled himself in like an idiot.

Pretty friendly sea monster.

The water filled his mouth, but he didn’t drown. He turned when he saw movement, but the creature that circled him, long and streamlined, was always just out of sight. It swooped through the thick water, giving scant glimpses of its long tail and powerful limbs that propelled it through the water as easily as a bird in flight.

The sea monsters responds to Amri pondering mortality by telling him he’s not dead.

“Um... am I going to die?”

“That is a strange question.”

Stupendous.

The sea monster’s voice (and general unhelpful way of answering questions presumably) pricks at Amri’s memory.

“Are you a Mystic?” he asked.

“Hmm... I am pretty mystical.”

Which is what Amri had said about urLii to Kylan and Naia back in the previous book!

Amri has enough of the vagueness or wondering whether he is or isn’t dead and just goes “I’m gonna go” because the whole conversation is like this. The Mystic asks Amri to wait and finally swims into sight.

Amri recognizes the multi-limbed individual as definitely a Mystic and guesses that they’re also the water spirit who is reputed to light the coast side lanterns.

But when the Mystic swims closer, Amri realizes what really seemed familiar about them. The Mystic’s eyes remind Amri of skekSa’s.

“Are you skekSa’s opposite?” Amri gasped.

“Opposition is a falsehood. Like day and night -- convenient words, but only part of the truth. For there exists such a thing as dawn, and also dusk. All phases in the turning of the spheres. I am merely a swimmer of the seas.”

!

It’s she!

They don’t name names here but its urSan the Swimmer!

Because in the game of not quite opposites between the Skeksis and the Mystics, skekSa said ‘i’m going to sail on top of the water haha’ and urSan went ‘ok i’mma swim everywhere’ and jumped into the ocean.

I can’t get over how great a concept that is. Just a urRu swimming everywhere.

Mystics are so ponderous on land but urSan is zooming around underwater. Maybe their problem is that they’re meant for the water.

She apparently also knows magic that negates the coldness of the water or the need to breath which explains why Amri is definitely not dead.

Amri asks if the Swimmer is here to help the Vapra, somehow believing “in the past, the Mystics had come to their aid when they had needed it most.”

“You already know how to help the Vapra,” the swimmer said, echoing his intonation so it was like hearing his own voice bubbling back at him.

“So you’re not going to help.”

“A compass is nothing without a ship.”

“Then point me in the right direction!”

“I already have.”

Because, yeah, that’s about the average level of helpful the urRu tend to be.

I mean, it is helpful, in the sense of you eventually figure things out. And Amri tries.

He keeps trying to puzzle through while the Swimmer keeps offering vague answers.

Amri complains that he doesn’t know anything about the Vapra or their city and that the Swimmer should be speaking to Tavra.

“I am speaking to whom I should be speaking. To the Shadowling that brought a song from deep caves to an oasis lake. Tell m, what is the difference between the waves of the sea and the waves of the sand?”

and

“What is the difference between crystals of stone and crystals of water?”

“Crystals of water?” Amri asked. Then he remembered. “You mean ice?”

“Deatea. Fire. Deratea. Air. Kidakida. Water. Arugaru. Earth. Four words with one center sound. Four elements with one central heart. Water becomes steam. Is that not air? And then it burns. Is that not fire? Dawn becomes day becomes dusk becomes evening becomes night. Becomes dawn once again. Where does one end and the other begin? Is there such a thing?”

This would be great for my fantasy setting with the elementalism magic system.

Its good stuff. I’m not sure where its leading. The solutions in these books tend to surprise me because they’re pretty magical.

Amri still doesn’t get it either and is now so confused that he’s seriously considering that he is drowning.

“But I’m a Grottan,” he called desperately. “I don’t know anything about waves except that I’m scared of the ocean. I don’t know anything about the daylighter world except that I’m clumsy at walking in it!”

You’re not clumsy at walking. You’re clumsy wearing shoes.

That’s pretty inspirational actually.

Not helping the unreality Amri feels, bubbles obscure the Swimmer and then propel Amri to the surface where he suddenly wakes up and finds himself on the deck of Onica’s ship, being shaken awake by Naia. Not wet at all from a dip in the ocean but a bit damp from snow melting on him.

Uh. Huh. Weird.

Naia is touching him to make sure he’s okay and they have a mutual blushy moment about that.

They go inside and Naia makes him a nice hot cup of... uh, water. Do people just drink hot water? There’s so many herbs in this boat.

“I had the strangest dream,” he said. It tasted like a lie. It couldn’t have been a dream, could it? He stared at the bundle of herbs in the center of the table, cold and dormant in the clay bowl. He shook his head. “Must have been a dream.”

He tells Naia what he dreamed, trying to be quiet but waking up everyone anyway. It seems more and more dreamlike the longer he’s awake and he’s pretty sure that the herbs that Onica used to try to Far-Dream earlier gave him a weird vivid dream.

Silly of him to think a Far-Dreamer would say a dream is just a dream.

“Even if it was a dream, that doesn’t mean it’s not important,” Onica replied. “Do you have any idea what it means?”

Amri blushed. “You’re the Far-Dreamer. Aren’t you supposed to be the one that knows...” Even as he spoke, he thought of what the Mystic had said. Dawn to day to dusk. Being a Far-Dreamer didn’t mean it was her responsibility to know everything there was to know about dreams. Perhaps he had been putting too much stock in titles.

You already know how to help the Vapra.

And this time he does already knows, it seems, because he suddenly darts out into the night, dismissing Tae’s concerns about the Skeksis since they can’t see very well at night.

Naia catches up with him and Amri feels comforted by having her at his side.

Shiiiiiiip tease.

They hike together into the city in silence where Amri does a thing.

Amri leaned down and pulled and pulled the straps off his sandals. Naia stood by and watched, hand on the hilt of her dagger. Ready to protect him from anything, even as he did something she didn’t totally understand. He tried not to worry what Naia would think of him, acting like a Shadowling in the middle of the Gelfling capital. He couldn’t worry about it. He had to be who he was.

He tossed the sandals aside, letting his back curve to the shape he had tried to hard to straighten. Barefoot, he crouched on the frozen stone pathways, and for the first time, his fingers and toes tasted the street of Ha’rar.

I’m of mixed feelings about this.

A revelation that Amri should just be himself does fit. His super move has been letting Tavra take over his body so she can do what she does do. But they don’t really do that enough that you have to start worrying about Amri wishing he were another person.

There was that bit where Tavra told him he couldn’t rely on Grottan tricks.... uh, and then his Grottan tricks don’t come up so much. Oh, Amri. Why won’t they let you be the weird alchemy boy?

He has had repeat things about being unfamiliar with shoes and walking without crouching but he wasn’t doing that to fit in socially. He had to wear sandal shoes because walking so much was doing a number on his feet. He had to walk not crouched because that was messing with him adapting to walking with sandals.

And in fairness, he puts the sandals back on after this so he doesn’t freeze his feets while walking back. So, the practical benefits of wearing shoes are recognized.

So I don’t know about Amri hadding to be who he was but I’m glad that he is.

Anyway. Amri has ground sense. Talking to sand and talking to rocks. Now, thanks to the Swimmer, he has realized that water is a beautiful spectrum and he can talk to ice too.

He gets a good feel for the vibrations of Ha’rar. The whole thing.

From the street to the Vapra homes to the citadel, the ocean and the cold blue mountains. It was all connected, intertwined somehow. As if some perfect, pure mineral laced the entire city in a web of crystal, originating from a source high in the mountains that looked down on Ha’rar.

Amri actually presses his ear to the ground to hear even better. And he hears how the song of Ha’rar differs from the mineral of the Dousan Wellspring or the rocks of the Caves of Grot.

This was fluid, like the sea or the lakes or rivers. Clear and pristine. Diamond-hard, carrying the thousand sounds of the city from one end to the other.

It was crystal, but not of stone.

OF COURSE ITS SO OBVIOUS NOW

No, I lie, I’m still lost.

What did you learn, Amri?

It was so simple, now that he knew. Now that he’d listened.

Dangit. Just tell me.

But he doesn’t. Cruel, cruel POV protagonist. Withholding plot.

“We have to get Tavra and Kylan to the trees of the Waystar grove,” he said. “I know how to send a message to the Vapra of Ha’rar.”

Fine, I guess I’ll read another chapter of the book I was already reading!

[ayma-nidiot]

In the White Light - Prideshipping fanfic Chapter 19

Chapter 19 – Queen of Games

“Phew!” Despite what everyone had been through, Joey felt relieved to feel the earth beneath his feet once more. “I think we better get out of here before we get covered in zombie goo.”

“I concur,” spoke Téa. “I think we’ve learned enough information for one day. Don’t you think so, pharaoh?”

“…” Yami Yugi’s breathed shallowly as he stared at the ground while kneeling.

“Pharaoh? You okay, man?” Joey offered a hand for Yami Yugi to take.

“I… I had no idea… That Anubis killed my father… And that Seto… He died trying to save me!”

Though his other friends tried to calm Yami Yugi down, they all failed. That is, until Kaiba came up to him and spoke to him bluntly, “Pharaoh! Snap out of it! That’s all in the past! Don’t you remember what you said back at Dartz’ lair? Through these new bodies, we may live again.”

“M-My love…” Yami Yugi stopped crying and used Kaiba as a crutch to get up. “Forgive me. I lied to you about your powers. All this time, I didn’t know that you can’t just transform into the Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon… you are the Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon.”

“Personally, being a dragon is what I’ve always wanted. Just you wait until we get back to Domino City. Then everyone will know who is the real queen of games.”

“Pfft… So you acknowledge you’re the one on the bottom?”

“If I wasn’t so damned tired, I would stick a dragon claw up your ass for that, Wheeler.”

“Oh come on, Joey.” Yugi cut in. “The sex life of those two is no business of ours.”

“You’re concerned about him but not for me getting threatened?”

Everyone else was laughing at this playful exchange except for Yami Yugi, and Kaiba looked concerned. “Babe? Was it something I said?”

“I…” Before Yami Yugi could say what he wanted to, he heard a familiar snickering from behind Anubis’ giant altar. “Oh!”

“Looks like we have some guests!” Tristan began to walk over. “Could it be… zombies?”

“Tristan, you’ve got to be the dumbest person on the planet to not recognize that laugh.” Joey walked ahead, and sure enough, Weevil Underwood could be found behind the altar. “You dung beetle! You’ve stalked us all this way? Why?”

“I… uh…” Weevil looked to the small white rabbit he cradled in his arms. “You see, I was trying to catch this rabbit, when all of a sudden, he wandered into this spooky chamber.”

“So you’re catching rabbits instead of insects now?” Joey questioned.

“Uh huh!”

Joey looked to the Duel Disks Weevil wore on either arm. “Where did you get that other Duel Disk?”

“Also, I’ve noticed that Raptor isn’t with you,” remarked Tristan.

“He… uh… He ran to the bathroom!”

“Guys, I think you should know something,” Yugi interjected. “I remember hearing in history class that rabbits weren’t domesticated until the Middle Ages. Even at that time, they were native to Europe.”

Before Weevil could fish for another excuse, the rabbit sneezed quietly a few times before doing one loud sneeze, transforming into Rex Raptor.

“Duuuuude…” Téa was no less amazed at Rex’s transformation than she was at Kaiba’s. “I didn’t know that Rex could turn into an animal too!”

“Hahaha!” Tristan teased. “You’re a little wabbit! You’re a little wabbit!”

“Wabbit want a carrot?” Joey happened to find a nearby bunch of carrots and dangled one in front of Rex.

“Well, excuuuuse me, princess! Not all of us can turn into god-like dragons!” Rex glared at Kaiba with jealousy.

Though Kaiba would normally have a retort for that, he looked upon Rex curiously. The rabbit from the vision quest… No, it can’t be. This boy is too daft.

“Now that you’re here,” Yami Yugi spoke up. “I’d like to ask you two something. I’ve heard the two of you survived a Shadow Game. Can you tell me a bit more about the duel?”

“I don’t really remember much…” Rex replied. “The guys we dueled were just two randos that used a bunch of zombie and fiend cards.”

“And…” Weevil shook in fear of recalling that duel. “When we defeated them, they actually died. I didn’t know Duel Monsters could do that to you!”

“You said zombie and fiend cards?” Joey recalled his battles from Duelist Kingdom. “It’s Bonz!”

“Joey, that’s ridiculous,” replied Tristan.

“Well, who else do we know that loves zombie cards so much?”

“Sp-Speaking of zombies…” Weevil alerted everyone to a single zombie that arose from the central altar. “That’s gotta be the biggest zombie I’ve ever seen!”

“AAAAAH!” Out of fear, Rex turned back into a rabbit and buried himself in Weevil’s lap. “Don’t eat me!”

Kaiba vaguely recognized this zombie and shielded his eyes from him.. “I’ve learned my lesson from last time… Don’t look at the penis.”

“You know him, rich boy?”

“Oh, he knows me…” The zombie, now fully formed, cackled.

“Anubis!” Yami Yugi couldn’t believe his eyes. “But how?”

“As the pharaoh, I thought you would know that in our culture, the dead can live again. But then again, you still haven’t regained all of your memories.”

“I would dare say I’ve remembered enough…” Yami Yugi shook in anger when he saw the Pyramid of Light hanging from Anubis’ neck. “Murderer.”

“I would dare say you haven’t! But if you defeat me in a duel right now, I’ll tell you the final piece of the puzzle. No pun intended.”

“Do you mean… Does it have anything to do with my real name?”

“Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t.”

“Seeing as how you’re not going to speak further on the topic…” Yami Yugi’s Duel Disk changed to battle form.

“I’ll even be generous and let you have the first turn,” Anubis spoke as he generated his starting hand out of thin air. “I’m curious to see how you’re going to defeat me without the aid of the Blue-Eyes Shining Dragon… Or should I say Seto Kaiba?”

“Pharaoh… You better give him hell.” Kaiba spoke through gritted teeth.

“Then… I summon Berry Magician Girl in attack mode. I use her special ability to add Kiwi Magician Girl to my hand.”

“Are you nuts, pharaoh?” Rex squeaked. “Leaving a 400-attack monster in attack mode?”

“Ugh, the Dweeb Patrol was already annoying before… You better not say anything else stupid, rabbit stew.”

“Y-Yeowch… You got it, Mr. Kaiba… Uh, sir…” Rex watched most of the rest of the duel hiding under Weevil’s hands.

Anubis liked his starting hand and the card he drew, but kept up his usual poker face. “I’ll set a card face down and end my turn.”

I have a chance to attack him directly so soon in the game… But I have a fair idea of what his set card is. “Here’s Lemon Magician Girl in attack mode! Her ability allows me to tribute Berry Magician Girl so I may add Dark Magician to my hand. Now… Lemon Magician Girl! Direct attack! I’ll set a card before ending my turn.”

“All right!” Joey cheered. “Anubis, you’ve gotta draw something real good to make it past next turn!”

“I’m surrounded by idiots…” Kaiba rubbed his temples.

“And that’s where I concur… Except for the pharaoh, of course, for he knows this card well. I reveal my trap, the Pyramid of Light! Now that this card is face up, I pay 1000 Life Points to Special Summon both Andro Sphinx and Sphinx Teleia from my hand!”

“Oh… I’m sorry, pharaoh, I just jinxed you.”

“I’ll also use my spell, Remove Trap, to destroy the Pyramid of Light. I take it you remember from our last duel what happens if the Pyramid is destroyed.”

“Yes, which is exactly why I use my counter trap Magic Drain! …You’re not going to summon Theinen, Anubis. I won’t let you.”

“Hrr… So you’ve stayed alive for one more turn. But even if you were live through this duel, your relationship with Kaiba is doomed for failure.”

Yami Yugi drew his next card, and before he summoned it, he demanded, “Elaborate.”

“I’m pretty sure you know by now that you are not meant to exist in the present day. So if you want to stay with Kaiba, then he’ll have to stay here in ancient Egypt with you. That is of course, after the highly unlikely event that he forgoes KaibaCorp.”

Kaiba had come to the grim realization that Anubis told the truth. “You’re asking me… to give up the company I’ve worked hard to build? The one that allows people all over the world to really enjoy dueling?”

Yes, that’s right… Anubis thought. Now’s the time to decide what you truly love most, Kaiba.

“Seto, don’t listen to him!” Mokuba gave Kaiba a firm side hug before glaring at Anubis. “You’re gonna be eating the pharaoh’s dust, ya creep!”

Yami Yugi tried not to let Anubis’ words get to him. “I summon Dreamsprite in defense mode, and after I switch Lemon Magician Girl to defense mode, I’ll end my turn.”

“Looks like you won’t be surviving this turn… For I play the spell Emergency Provisions! I can destroy any of my own spells and traps, and gain 1000 Life Points per card. So not only do I gain the Life Points I paid to summon my sphinxes, but I also get to Special Summon my ace monster from my hand…”

“Theinen the Great Sphinx…” Yami Yugi watched this monster in slight fear.

“I will pay 500 more Life Points to increase my monster’s attack by 3000. And if you thought your monsters are safe in defense mode, you’re wrong… Obedience forces your Dreamsprite into attack mode!”

“But you won’t be attacking her! I use Dreamsprite’s special ability to redirect your attack to my Lemon Magician Girl! Using her special ability, I can summon Dark Magician from my hand and redirect your attack at him.”

“Hmph. You’ve sure got an interesting way of playing tag, pharaoh. Now make your move!”

“So I shall. Draw!” Yami Yugi didn’t expect this unusual draw to be in his deck. “Red-Eyes Fusion?” I’ve never seen this card before! Not even when I was searching my deck for Dark Magician and Kiwi Magician Girl! …Joey. It’s you, isn’t it? Thank you, my friend. But I can’t use your card yet. It’s not enough to defeat Theinen. “I’ll turn Dreamsprite back to defense mode.”

“I can still destroy your Dreamsprite with Theinen, though!”

Another Red-Eyes card! Yami Yugi looked at the card he drew, Return of the Red-Eyes. But is it going to help me? Especially since I don’t have any monsters in my hand right now? “I’ll just set a card face-down.”

“…Now that your Lemon Magician Girl is finally gone, the rest of your Life Points will be as well!”

I don’t want to waste this Red-Eyes Fusion so quickly. But if I must, then I will… Heart of the cards, guide me! …Yes! This Horn of the Unicorn should be enough! “I play a spell, Red-Eyes Fusion, to Fusion Summon Red-Eyes Slash Dragon!”

Joey was too amazed at this monster to speak his mind aloud. Where in the heck did the pharaoh get a Red-Eyes?!

“I also reveal my face-down card, Return of the Red-Eyes, to summon Red-Eyes Black Dragon from the Graveyard. Then I’ll equip it with Horn of the Unicorn – and a Warrior monster from my Graveyard – which should be plenty for your Theinen the Great Sphinx to handle!”

“You’ve got a new monster. Big deal! But it’s not big enough to defeat this… I Fusion Summon the strongest Beast monster of all! Master of Oz!”

“Yikes! The thing’s got 4200 attack points! If only you had big bro’s Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon.”

Kaiba didn’t have the energy or desire to say “Shut up, Mokuba” aloud.

“Crush that Red-Eyes Slash Dragon, Master of Oz! I would wish you good luck in drawing something good, pharaoh, but not even all of the luck in the world can save you now! Hahahaha!”

“Do you really think so?”

“What are you playing at?”

“These new Red-Eyes cards have all kinds of special abilities! First, I redraw Horn of the Unicorn. I use Return of the Red-Eyes to Special Summon Dark Magician from my Graveyard! I also use my Slash Dragon’s special ability to summon the Warrior monster I used for its Fusion Summon… Evocator Chevalier!”

“And…? Still barely even half the attack points you need to defeat my Master of Oz!”

“I fully recognize that. I equip Evocator Chevalier with Horn of the Unicorn. Using Evocator Chevalier’s special ability, I send its equip spell to the Graveyard…”

“To do what, exactly?”

“Destroy your Master of Oz!”

“…” Anubis quickly realized what was to come, and in his mind, he already conceded defeat.

“Now you’re wide open to attack! Evocator Chevalier and Dark Magician! Attack Anubis’ Life Points directly and finish this duel!”

“Hah…” Anubis knelt, his soul beginning to disintegrate. “Well… done… pharaoh. I do not have much time left, but I suppose I owe you a reward. There is a reason you don’t remember your real name. It is a password that will unlock the true power of your Millennium Puzzle and the Pharaoh’s Incantation. If you want to defeat your final enemy, then you need to remember it at all costs.”

When Anubis had finally disappeared, Joey broke the silence that followed. “He’s gone for good this time, right?”

“Mm. Joey… Thank you.”

“For what? All I did was give you unlucky vibes, thanks to my big mouth.”

“But you snuck those Red-Eyes cards into my deck.”

“Believe me, pharaoh, if those cards were really mine, I would proudly claim them.”

“Then who…”

“Ah… ACHOO!” Rex sneezed, reverting to human form.

“We should change your name to Sneezy,” Joey remarked.

“Very funny, Joey. Pharaoh, those cards are mine. I snuck them into your deck during the vision quest.”

“You were there? I mean… How did you get them in the first place?”

“You forget that Weevil and I once worked for a guy that had every card ever made.”

“But why did you do it?” Yami Yugi gave Rex his cards back.

“Well…” Rex paused as he tried to think of the right words. “I’ve tried being a super villain and I failed miserably at it… I figured I might try to be a good guy for once. Those cards really saved my butt in the tag duel, I’ll have you know.”

Weevil didn’t like this talk of Rex wanting to be one of the “good guys.” “Rex! Where’s your pride as a bad guy and as Joey’s ultimate rival?”

For once, Joey gave Rex a warm smile. “He already is a worthy rival.”

“I… Er… Uh… Thanks, I guess.” Rex blushed happily.

“You, on the other hand, bug boy… You could certainly take a page from Rex’s book.”

“Yeah! At least he plays fairly!” Téa added.

“And to think, you call yourself a worthy rival to the pharaoh…” Kaiba’s eyes narrowed. “Disgusting.”

“Guys, stop it! You don’t know what he’s been through!” Rex gave Weevil a full hug without thinking, and quickly broke that hug.

“Rex, you dino brain!” Weevil mumbled. “You want to let everyone know?”

“I don’t see what the problem is! If the pharaoh is bold enough to let his entire kingdom know about his relationship, then… then surely…”

“No. I don’t trust them.” Weevil trembled with resentment as everyone else in the room glowered at him. “I’ll never trust these jerks!”

“Okay, enough of that!” Joey intervened. “Let’s go find the pharaoh’s real name!”

“My real name… We’re not going to find it here, guys. Let’s return to the palace to rest. We’ve been through a lot today.”

[terresdebrumestories]

Power Ranger

✗ TECHNICAL DETAILS

FANDOM: Digimon Adventure 01/02/Tri RATING: General Audiences. WORDCOUNT: 1 964 words PAIRING(S): Pre-Taito/Yamachi. CHARACTER(S): Taichi Kamiya, Yamato Ishida, Genai, and a special appearance from Miyako. Mimi is mentioned in passing. GENRE: Coffeeshop disaster. TRIGGER WARNING(S): None, but Taichi may make you feel some second hand embarassment. SUMMARY: So there’s this guy. He has a Power Rangers shirt, and he’s cute. He’s also a walking catastrophe, but in a cute way.

“I hope your boss doesn’t know you call his clients shitheads,” the guy with a Power Rangers shirt chuckles as the miffed ass stomps out of the door, “you could get in trouble.”

 He’s cute, Yamato will give him that, as well as a bonus point for the pun on his shirt, but that doesn’t mean he’s about to take that kind of criticism lying down. Not with the mood he’s in.

 “First of all,” he says while he gathers the coffee cups on a nearby table, mostly so he won’t start punching people, “I called him a fucking shithead, which he should take as compliment because it assumes he does get laid. Second, barista doesn’t have ‘act as a punching bag for assholes and bigots’ on the job requirement.’

 He wipes at a stain with more force than necessary for several seconds, breathing through his nose until he’s reasonably sure he’s not going to shout his next sentence:

 “Third, this is my shop. I get to throw homophobes out if I want to.”

 Power Ranger blinks at that, grows very red, and bursts into laughter, loud and uninhibited to the point of borderline obnoxiousness. It’s a hearty sound, though, and the way he throws his head back to get it all out sends heat blooming at the back of Yamato’s neck, so he doesn’t really try to hush the guy.

 Yamato does have to keep working, though. His regulars are used to the occasional odd person coming into the shop, but he holds no illusion as to his personality’s power to keep people coming if he stops doing a good job at hosting them.

He’s walking back to the counter with a tray full of dirty dishes when Power Ranger follows him, having apparently forgotten where he is, just to hiss:

 “Sorry, I just—fucking shithead. It’s hilarious!”

 It’s...really not? At least, Yamato doesn’t think the joke is that good. And it certainly doesn’t compensate for having to deal with an asshole like that, but hey. At least Power Ranger isn’t telling him to be more patient or accept that some people want him dead and that’s just how life is, so there’s that.

He still shoots a look at Mr. Genai over the counter, rolling his eyes and smirking a little when Mr. Genai gives him a ‘people are strange’ kind of shrug. It used to be Mr. Genai would rebuke Yamato’s outbursts at clients, sometimes even though he thought Yamato was in the right.

Nowadays, he’s either changed his stance on how to deal with terminal assholes, or come to the conclusion that Yamato is a good enough owner to keep the shop afloat without having to kiss everyone’s boots. Either way, it’s a show of support that means a lot, considering Mr. Genai is the last vaguely parental figure in Yamato’s life.

 He nods at Power Rangers in acknowledgement, and maybe in thanks, too. Just a little. He’s not that starved for positive attention that he’ll admit it out loud but, well. It is a nice change to meet someone who appreciate his sense of, uh. Humor.

Power Ranger doesn’t seem to realize the exchange is over, though: he follows Yamato to the back of the shop, and barely stops in time to avoid a collision with the half-door marked ‘employees only’. Yamato is emptying his tray into the dishwasher, which is finally full enough to run, when Power Ranger calls out over the wood:

 “What kind of college-age guy has his own coffee shop though? I mean you’re, what, twenty-five? Ish? I’m not good at white people ages but—”

 The tray rattles when Yamato sets it down on the counter top.

 “I’m Japanese.”

 Technically, he’s a quarter French, but it’s not even like it shows that much outside of the eyes and hair, damn it!

 “Oh, cool!” Power Ranger exclaims, the grin audible in his voice. “Do you speak Japanese?”

“Yes.”

 Yamato was born in Japan, even. Spent the first eleven years of his life there until his mother’s job as a journalist moved the family to San Francisco. He may have spent more time outside of Tokyo than in, but that doesn’t mean he’s forgotten it, and having to prove he’s Japanese enough to people like Power Rangers who wear their origins on their faces got tiring something like five minutes into the first iteration of that particular conversation.

 “That’s nice,” Power Ranger continues, still in Japanese, “because you look really cute and it’s easier to flirt without an audience.”

“Mr. Genai speaks Japanese as well.”

 Yamato turns around to get back in the main room just as Power Ranger throws a barely-embarrassed grin toward Mr. Genai, and he almost chuckles at the sight. The guy, if nothing else, doesn’t seem to have a shy bone in his body.

 “With all due respect to Mr. Genai, if he’s your employee he can’t tell you off for being seduced on the job.”

“Who says any of what you’re doing is working, here?”

 Yamato does not shiver when he brushes past Power Ranger on his way back to the counter—no, really, he doesn’t. He does feel some heat creeping up his neck and into his ears, though.

 “No one, but being optimistic doesn’t hurt,” Power Ranger retorts with an even wider grin that does things to Yamato’s insides.

 It’s a little embarrassing, but then again, the guy is good looking, cute, somewhat funny in an accidental way, and he’s also not even trying to be subtle about his intentions. There’s no harm in indulging in the charm while it lasts, right?

 “Maybe you’ve got it wrong and I’m not queer. I could be keeping homophobes out of my shop for the sake of a friend or family member. Or just as a decent human being.”

“As one of my best friends would say,” Power Ranger quotes with a finger in the air while Yamato wipes down the counters and sets on cleaning the coffee machine, “'the quest for true love was always dependent on taking risks'. Who knows, maybe I’ll get lucky and you’ll catch the gay bug after a while.”

“’Sur un malentendu ça peut marcher’,” Yamato mutters, and Power Ranger’s eyes widen into a look of pleased surprise so intense he all but leans across the pick up station to ask:

“Was that French I heard?”

“Get off my counter, you’ll get me in trouble with the hygiene division. Yes, it was.”

“So, wait, you’re the college-aged owner of a fairly popular shop, a blond Japanese guy and you speak French? The thick plottens! You must explain!”

“Sorry,” Yamato replies, unashamedly quoting Tumblr, “you have to be at least a level three friend before you can unlock my tragic backstory.”

“What if I take you out on a date though? Do I have to be a level three date mate to unlock your backstory or does that come with its own set of rules?”

 At the orders station, Mr. Genai tries and fails to cover a laugh under the scrap of his chair on tiled floor, which gives Yamato just enough time to smooth a stupid grin off his face before Power Ranger looks back to him.

 “I think Mr. Genai likes me.”

“I think Mr. Genai thinks you’re ridiculous.”

“I think Mr. Genai can do both of these things at the same time,” Mr. Genai says from the counter.

 The wind catchers on the door chime at that moment, as if to punctuate the exchange, and Yamato starts on a tall soy latte as soon as he hears Mr. Genai greet Miyako. She’s one of Takeru’s school friends, and she mostly comes to the neighborhood to visit Mimi’s pastry shop, across the street, but considering she swings by for an order almost every time, Yamato isn’t about to complain.

 “I’m still at work,” he tells Power Rangers without bothering to put any heat in it, “you need to order something or let me do my job.”

“Do I get your number if I order something?”

 Yamato turns around to the sound of Miyako choking on her own laughter, face hidden behind her hands as she stands next to Power Ranger and makes a valiant attempt at pretending she’s not laughing at the both of them. Yamato just sighs and hands her her usual drink, with a reminder for the dinner at his place the next weekend.

 “I know you remember but Takeru would kill me if I didn’t make really really sure.”

“No worries. See you Saturday!”

“Please,” Power Ranger all but whines, “tell me Takeru isn’t your boyfriend.”

“He’s my little brother.”

“Oh! Little brother is fine—I’ve got a little sister, if they’re the same age—”

“Will you please go order something?”

 Power Ranger dissolves in apologies, words coming out of his mouth at almost superhuman speed for the next ten seconds, before he goes to the counter and asks Mr. Genai for whichever dairy-free cold drink he likes best.

Yamato makes extra sure no one can see him grin like a loon, grateful that he decided to grow his hair out again this year. There’s nothing to be done about his ears, but at least that way Power Ranger can’t see him flush redder than a tomato.

Or, you know, write his number on the paper cup he pours the drink in.

 “Thanks,” Power Rangers says with a wide, wide smile when he retrieves his drink.

 Then he walks out of the shop like he hasn’t just spent the past half-hour flirting at Yamato like his life depended on it.

 “Not to be intrusive,” Mr. Genai remarks in soft Japanese, “but it seemed to me like a rather speedy departure.”

“Yeah,” Yamato agrees, more disappointed than he cares to admit, “that was fast.”

 He’s barely finished his sentence when Power Ranger pops back into view, slams the door to the shop open hard enough to make several customers jump in place—Mrs. Izumi even spills her tea—and runs up to the counter, red faced and out of breath:

 “I’m so sorry,” he heaves in English, “I’m so stupid, I completely forgot to ask for your number!”

“It’s on the cup,” Yamato replies, too puzzled to to anything more than point at the item in question.

 Power Ranger nods, turns around to leave again and, halfway through the shop, swirls back around to say:

 “Almost forgot: my name’s Taichi. I’ll talk to you soon!”

 This time he opens and closes the door like a normal human being, which is a relief. Yamato might find Taichi’s flustered attitude adorable—flattering, even—but that doesn’t mean it’s very good for his business.

He watches Taichi pause outside the door for a wide fist pump, then realize everyone inside the shop can see him and walk off with his face in his hands...straight into a streetlight.

 Yamato may or may not choke in laughter at the sight, and he may or may not still be laughing about it when his phone buzzes.

 ‘So,’ Taichi’s text reads, ‘I will totally understand if you ask me to delete your number after this truly stunning display of human disastrousness.’

‘Honestly,’ Yamato replies, opting for Japanese just to see if Taichi can read it, ‘I get the feeling this kind of thing is why I will agree to go on a second date.’

 It takes a while, but Taichi does reply with a long, long string of relieved, then happy, then dancing emojis.

 (He pretends to be offended when Yamato shows the text exchange off on their wedding night four years later, but the way he keeps bragging about seducing Yamato through unabashed weirdness kind of gives the charade away.)

[team-skull-admin]

My favorite 40 games of all-time

Made an arbitrary list of my favorite games of all-time cause I wanted to figure out where Breath of the Wild is on it. It’s, uh, pretty high. Assload of text below the break.

40: Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow I'm not the world's biggest Symphony of the Night fan (outside of the incredible soundtrack) and I think this is where Iga's seamless platformers found their footing.

39: Call of Juarez: Gunslinger I love goofy, experimental games like this and Far Cry: Blood Dragon, but I think the schtick in this (an unreliable narrator bragging about their heroic exploits) works better than Blood Dragon's dorky 80s nostalgia.

38: Rayman Origins A beautiful platformer with incredible level design. The music for the diabolical secret level is seared into my memory.

37: Cibele A short, story-centric indie game that captures the essence of playing MMOs in the mid-2000s and long-distance relationships. The awkward conversations in this game made me think about my WoW years for an entire weekend.

36: Mario Kart Wii It's not technically the "best" Mario Kart, but I actually enjoyed the motorcycles and I have fond memories of crushing my brother while we downed beers and talked shit.

35: Guild of Dungeoneering I'm usually not super into "We made X game, but added CARDS!" even though I love card games, but they nailed the loop here. I vaguely remember one of the decks being super busted, though.

34: Tropico 4 Adding a political slant to Sim City by making you the leader of a banana republic was just the slant to that formula I was looking for, and I lost a weekend circa New Year's '13 just delving into this hard.

33: Gran Turismo 2 My brother bought a PS1 off a friend when they upgraded to a PS2, and I grabbed a copy of this cheaply at the local EB Games. Once I wrapped my mind around the simulation, upgrading cars and havin fun with them here might have more to do with me being somewhat of a car person than anything else.

32: Metal Gear Solid 4 I should really put the whole series on here, but MGS4 deserves special note for making the core stealth actually fun and somehow tying all the loose ends of the insane plot together while dialing up the insanity even further.

31: Sim City 2000 I figured out how to make a 50,000 person city when I was like, 8. I still have no fucking idea how I did this. It took me till my 20s to crack 100k.

30: Pokemon Black/White People are torn on this game, but the contentious design decision to hide the old Pokemon in the postgame made every new encounter incredibly exciting in a way the series hadn't been since the orignals. The writing also shows signs of the maturity that Sun/Moon would follow through with.

29: Dragon Warrior Monsters 2 I think most would deride this series as a soulless Pokemon cash-grab on the surface, but they're actually roguelikes with a crazy monster breeding system and the most rote of stories to get you into the core loop of exploring new keys to breed ever crazier monsters.

28: Diablo 3: Reaper of Souls Diablo 3 vanilla's reliance on the auction house created design issues that were hard to look past, but Blizzard abandoning it for the expansion made the game into an incredible dungeon crawler. I never laddered, but had fun for hundreds of hours chasing loot with friends.

27: Fallout 3 I'll never forget the feeling of walking out of the vault for the first time, and feeling like I could go anywhere. I also think this is the only Bethesda game that regularly pays off when exploring - weird shit like the Republic of Dave or the man stuck in the tree are fantastic rewards for poking at the less inhabited edges of the map.

26: Bassin's Black Bass featuring Hank Parker I'm honestly wondering if the rest of the world has picked up on this game's low-key genius since I saw it for 15 bucks at a retro game store recently, but this game's arcadey fishing is incredibly satisfying and snappy. It has some major, obvious, irritating mechanical issues, but the core gameplay loop is so good I don't care.

25: Middle Earth: Shadow of Mordor I still remember my nemesis. This motherfucker was right at the beginning of the game, inside the first quest area, and was like level 5 or 6, but had a defensive ability that made it harder for me to gank him easily. So he killed me. Twice. And leveled up each time, becoming a level 12 badass who could literally sniff me out when I hid. But he was weak to fire, and I lured him to a campfire and set him ablaze, getting my revenge.

24: Super Metroid I feel like most people would have this game higher on the list, but I think the controls are floaty and Meridia is overly confusing. The rest of the game is incredible and I can't believe they pulled it off on a Super Nintendo.

23: Pokemon Sun/Moon After XY and ORAS were disapointments I was cool on Pokemon, but Sun/Moon challenged a ton of series conventions and got a lot right in the process. I can't believe how deftly this game handles dysfunctional families.

22: A Link Between Worlds This was Nintendo's hit at what was to come with Zelda - a smart, experimental take on the franchise that's easily its best 2d outing.

21: Muramasa: The Demon Blade Vanillaware's magnum opus, a gorgeous Metroidvania where everything is hand-painted. The combat's loop of mixing launchers with sword management is also incredibly fun, if not particularly deep. But fuck I loved looking at it so much and it felt good.

20: The Walking Dead Only time a video game made me cry.

19: Banjo-Kazooie The only 3d collect-a-thon platformer from that era that still holds up, it combines cheeky humor and an incredible soundtrack to craft a world that's always surprising.

18: Borderlands 2 is better crafted, but I enjoyed the dry wit and more grounded guns of the first. I've replayed this like 4 times and I'm not entirely sure why, but I have a blast each time.

17: Doom (2016) Apparently the secret to making this license work in a modern context is to give Halo combat arenas a healthy dose of cocaine and play Meshuggah riffs over it. It so fucking works.

16: Saints Row: The Third I think the writing in GTA is usually sophomoric at best and its attempts at commentary are eye-roll worthy, but having a game say "FUCK IT" and just Mel Brooks that experience is such a wonderful idea. It's also hard to pull off, and SR3 totally sticks the landing (unlike the sequel).

15: Super Mario World The best traditional Mario game. I replayed it recently, and it struck me how much secret exits add to the level design versus 3, and how freed Koji Kondo is by the new hardware. The castle music's classical overture sticks out.

14: Monster Hunter 4 I liked Monster Hunter 3's various iterations but I hated swimming. Taking out swimming and replacing it  with mounting was enough for me to sink hundreds of hours. I actively avoided getting Generations because I knew it would interfere with school.

13: Mario Golf (GBC) The perfect portable game. Golf works well on the platform, and adding basic RPG hooks was enough to make a rote story totally engaging.

12: Super Mario Maker I think the real triumph of Mario Maker isn't the levels (which are usually terrible), it's how Nintendo imparted the feeling of being creative in such an easily digestible and satisfying way. It's an achievement that ascends past Mario design (which still works here) into something greater and more profound.

11: Hearthstone I fucking hate this game and I keep playing it because the Arena is like literal fucking crack and every time I have an opponent at 1 life and they beat me they can eat fucking dicks.

10: Super Mario RPG Clever writing and a strange world grabbed me way harder than Intelligent System's later Paper Mario games. It's too easy and doesn't look as slick now, but the writing still holds up.

09: Mass Effect Trilogy You can't really separate these, as the experience that makes Mass Effect great was carrying your Shepard and their decisions from one game to the next. Everyone will remember Garrus, Wrex, and co. Shame about the ending.

08: Tetris I am weirdly good at Tetris. I know what a T-Spin is. I sank hundreds of hours into it on Facebook. I don't regret it.

07: Persona 4 Describe a game to me as a mix of a J-RPG and a slice-of-life anime and I'll run to the hills, so the fact this game's sharp, mature writing and "just one more day" calendar mechanic combined into one of my favorite games of all-time is a shock. They also put in Pokemon with fucking demons, how cool is that shit?

06: Ocarina of Time I can't believe this game came out in 1998. The world is still fun to traverse, and the dungeon design (especially as an adult) still holds up at the top of action-adventure puzzle design.

05: Magic: the Gathering I wish it was less expensive otherwise it'd be higher.

04: Breath of the Wild I can't believe Nintendo reinvented the wheel so well that I'm putting the game so high on the list. Every design decision in this game is carefully considered to make exploring this iteration of Hyrule that much more satisfying. And its incredibly clever chemistry engine, where every object in the game has chemical properties that can be manipulated as well as physics, creates a ton of emergent gameplay scenarios where you're constantly asking "Can I do that?" and the game almost never lets you down.

03: World of Warcraft Sometimes I regret the 4000 hours I spent in Azeroth, but I'd have a hard time giving up the friends I made there. I could probably shred and like, speak another language though.

02: Pokemon Red I was the perfect age for Pokemon mania, and the fact that the core game was literally designed to appeal to me didn't help. I still love collecting the things and min/maxing ways to beat the Elite 4 with minimal grinding.

01: Mega Man X I think this is literally the perfect platformer. Moving X feels incredible. There's nothing in any of the levels I think is out of place. The soundtrack is a masterpiece. And the game's hidden secret is so insane you'd probably call bullshit on any kid who told it to you at recess. I'm really glad the rest of the world picked up on it after Arin Hanson did a Sequelitis about it, because I've been beating this drum for decades.

[marysuereactors]

Jane Anemone Smith - Percy Jackson

Hi ! I’m sending you an Percy Jackson OC for a review, if you’re not too busy. English is not my first language and I’m translating this, so I apologize for the mistakes you’ll probably find here <.< Thanks a lot for your time !

 BLARGHHHH SORRY SOMEHOW THE POST GOT FUCKED UP BUT DON’T WORRY WE GOT IT UNDER CONTROL-- The mods are out so this is Vixel speaking.

Full name : Jane Anémone Smith

Interesting name, I like it.

Godly parent : Lethe. The first reaction for most people about it is usually « Wait, isn’t that a river ? ». Lethe was/is actually also a goddess. However, the thing about Lethe’s children is that no one remembers them. Jane is always being forgotten, almost immediately. Actually, Percy and Nico remembered her. Nico because he’s the son of Hades and she’s linked to the Underworld through her mother ; and Percy because she’s linked to a river, which is… Well, water. Lethe, here, is considered being linked to the river. She can be seen as the human form of the river. It means that only sons/daughters of Hades or Poseidon, and eventually a few children of Hecate can remember her, but that still requires lots of efforts. And since there are plenty of sons of Poseidon and Hades… There aren’t many people to remember her. Lethe doesn’t have her own cabin - she’s probably been forgotten, or maybe she forgot to ask for it, and anyway, she doesn’t have many children. Or rather, Lethe might not remember who her children are. Lethe is an unbelievably vague person. Jane has never met any of her brother/sister. If she really spends a lot of time with people, they will end up remembering her, but if they stay away, they will forget everything about her again (it’s like learning something new : if you study it several times, you will learn it correctly, but you may forget everything if you don’t go back to it every now and then)

I... Well, yes the rivers used to be gods/goddesses and are capable of spawning children, but... rivers usually spawn nymphs if anything. I’m not entirely sure if you can get a demigod out of Lethe, but a nymph sure can... Just... I’m gonna continue reading.

Also I should mention, there was a nymph of the river Acheron (river of pain I think) and I don’t recall her giving pain to people who pass her by or see her. I give bonus points for creativity on the not remembering part, but, I think you should maybe check more into the rivers and having children. Meaning/origin of the name : Her father just liked the name « Jane », and he had an ancestor who was named « Anémone » (french). However, here, « Jane » can make you think to « Jane Doe », and in « Anémone », there is « nemo »,  which means « no one » or « nobody » in latin. As for Smith, it’s a very common name. And Jane is very common… [Of course, it’s just a coincidence. Her father wasn’t thinking « Hey, which generic name could I pick for her ? ». However, Jane finds it very ironic that even the part of her name that’s supposed to be original, Anémone, can be linked to that kind of things]

Hm... uh... Well, I guess it passes. I dunno, the Anemone part kind of bothers me but we’ve had other out of the world names in PJO I believe so it works. Nicknames : Mostly « Hey, you ! ». Her father calls her « Mona » sometimes, in reference to Anémone. Most of the time, people don’t remember her name anyway, so it’s already great when they call her Jane. Gender : female Age : 16 Appearance : Straight brown hair. She usually have a ponytail, because they’re long, but she prefers when she lets her hair down. However, in the Camp, it might be dangerous, so she just ties them up most of the time. She also has brown eyes. She doesn’t have any scar, piercing, tattoo, or any distinguish feature. If you do look at her very carefully, you can notice that she doesn’t have any beauty spot at all, on her entire body. It’s actually rather weird and can make you feel slightly uncomfortable, though it’s hard to tell why. Other then that, well, she’s exactly the kind of girl no one would remember. Normal height, normal weight, not looking ugly but not specially pretty,… Normal. Actually, changing her appearance could be a way to be more «  noticeable », but she has already tried it. She tried a lot of different hair colors, lots of jewelry, clothes from insane colors… The result is always the same. No one looks at her for more than a couple of seconds. Plus, she actually doesn’t like being noticed too much. Not that it ever really happened, so, well, she’s not used to it. When Percy or Nico talked to her or just remembered her name, she absolutely didn’t know how to react.

I mean... Okay. The appearance is fine and her changing her clothes often is pretty neat on the other hand. Still a little iffy about that last paragraph, but... I’ll see it to the end. Personality : she’s a rather shy girl, and that’s what most people see about her. Shyness. Truth is, she’s rather smart. She has an amazing memory, which is quite ironic. She thinks she should be used to people not remembering her, but she still feels bad about it when it happens. What hurts her the most is that, though Nico and Percy remember her, they don’t realize what’s really happening to her (but that’s mostly her fault, since she didn’t explain it to Percy). She’s also a very nice person, very empathic, and it comes from the fact that she spends most of her time watching people. She’s a good listener, but she can be a bit awkward and boring, since she’s not used to social interaction. She’s always wondering what her life would be if people could remember her. She’s not even blaming them anymore. What for ? They can’t help it. No one can, not even her mother. Sometimes, she just thinks it’s no one’s fault and takes it rather well ; but on other days, she just hates everyone and feels awful about it. She laughs very easily, and loves to laugh and to forget her life, even just for a few minutes. She really enjoys watching stupid videos on Youtube because she finds it distressing… She keeps on trying to be optimistic, and she gets stressed easily. It’s hard do describe her personality, since she doesn’t have so much specific traits. If she was to describe herself, she’d probably say she is common. To be more specific, she would probably add what she likes and doesn’t like, and wouldn’t find much to say to describe herself. She might say she’s a bit curious, and extremely calm. She could spend days into her room, alone. She had no choice but to become lonely, actually… She only has a few « friends » in the camp Half-blood, and one girl in her school (she has no idea how that girl can remember her).

Okay, at this point I don’t really think this whole “no one can remember her” thing is gonna work. It’s likely that rivers can only give life to nymphs, and even then, it doesn’t seem like nymphs really attain any attributes/features from the rivers they came from. I think you should just remove the whole remembering thing and maybe just say that she’s really inconspicuous and the least person to talk to when it comes to crowds and people. Bio : She didn’t know she was special or anything for a very long time. Her life with her father means everything to her, she really loves him, and the time she’s spending with him is what matters the most to her. They talk a lot, and also make the other one discover what they like (movies, music,…). She was a pretty normal kid, except she didn’t have many friends. When she grew up, it just worsened, and soon, no one would talk to her at school. She really didn’t understand why. When she was 13, she met her mother for the first time, and she explained her the situation. Her mother looked very pale, almost like she could disappear at any second. Actually, she did, immediately after she finished her explanation, leaving Jane angry and sad. Jane went to the Camp half-blood for the first time that summer, and she’s going there every year since that. She met Percy recently though. She made a few friends there, but it didn’t always end well… Just before Leo, Piper, Jason and Annabeth went away on the Argo II, her mother appeared to her for the second time, and told her she had to go with them. Jane said that she couldn’t because she wasn’t in the prophecy. Lethe told her that she had been forgotten in the prophecy [which is not completely true, it’s explained later]. Jane did as she was told and went to the New Rome with everyone. It was quite hard to explain, but they decided to trust her, on Percy and Hazel’s advice (Hazel being a daughter of Pluto, she can remember her as well). She already had a big crush on Leo at that time, and, slowly, the two became closer. Actually, they became « a thing », and there was some kissing, flirting and everything. That’s when Leo disappeared on Ogygia and met Calypso. When he came back, he was in love with Calypso and didn’t remember Jane at all (he had been away for too long). After this, Jane felt like she could disappear completely. Hazel really helped her going through it. Jane didn’t have any role at all in the quest, and when she came back, she really had no idea why her mother had told her to go. Later, Lethe will explain her that her children are here to keep memory of everything. To remember. When Leo will come back to life, weirdly, he will remember her, but it will already be too late and he’s in love with Calypso. Jane will actually completely disappear ten years exactly after the quest. It will worry Hazel a lot, but Nico will explain her that according to the legend Lethe’s children are just going back to the river, changing to water at one point. They only have one purpose, to remember, and when they’ve seen what’s important, they just go away. This is not exactly true. Lethe’s children are actually getting what they call a second chance : their life changes completely, for a reason that seems normal, and slowly, people seems to remember them. Really remember them. That’s what will happen to Jane, and she’ll never go back to her previous life as a demigod. She has the intuition that she ever tries to, even if it’s just calling one of her old friends, or texting them, or going in a town she used to go to, people will forget her again. She will have a husband and one child.

... What. I-- Huh? Big question: Is this OC for rping or for story? Either way, I’m not sure how you can effectively use this OC because, well... You really put too much emphasis on the forgetting/remembering part. It’s a questionable thing to begin with, but that aspect of Jane really covers up anything else about her. Literally, all I remember about this OC is that barely anyone can remember her, she remembers stuff, and she’s constantly changing her wardrobe. You need to put some more spazz in other parts of her, etc. Actually, the forgetting part might be the reason why nothing else sticks out for this OC. Easy on the remembrance, more on the character so she can grow rather than to be stuck to this one purpose and such.

Also, I really think Jane should be a nymph rather than a demigod. Just do some more research on the rivers please, and make sure it’s possible to actually have a demigod be born from a river. I know PJO is really out there, but it still does keeps itself aligned with the basis of Greek/Roman mythology. Hobbies : Probably reading and watching movies. She doesn’t really likes sports, except swimming, and she does it only for fun. She hates competition. She also really likes writing, but she always feel like her stories are rather annoying. However, she’s very good at telling what she sees on her everyday life. She has a diary, but she only writes in it with something really special happens. She has a great culture when it comes to antic Greece and Rome, and a few other historical events, but she’s mostly a normal teenager.

Looks good. Likes and dislikes : Most people, looking at her, would probably assume that she’s the kind of girl who listens only to classic music and reads big, annoying books. Truth is, she loves funny songs, and especially rock. Sometimes, she dislikes the music but loves the lyrics, so she likes the song anyway. She loves it when she can yell the lyrics out loud (one of her favorite song is « Gives you hell »). She’s not interested in fantasy, because she says there are enough things happening in her world. She also loves detective stories, because they’re realistic, and are taking place in a world with only humans. Weirdly, it’s her way to escape her monsters-filled reality. She also likes to dance, even if she’s not really good at it. She enjoys walking in the forest with only her thoughts as well. She loves chocolate and french fries. Her favorite season is autumn, because it’s a season when everything feels dreary. It makes her feel a little more in her place. She also loves going to the cinema. She loves movies with a lot of action. There are also, of course, things she hates. One thing she hates, but she would never say it, is people who are amazing and… Well, noticeable. She’s totally jealous of them. She’s really trying her best to hide it because she knows it’s not right, but it’s burning her inside. She can’t stand Piper, for example. She doesn’t know how to feel about Annabeth either (truth is she had a small crush on Percy some time ago…). She doesn’t really like vegetables. She could probably live with only meat (if there wasn’t all those problems about vitamins of course…). She’s afraid of heights when she feels like she could fall. She doesn’t mind being on a tree, but she hates climbing. She hates fighting and is really bad at it. She also hates weapons - she doesn’t mind watching movies with weapons, but she can’t stand it in real life. She doesn’t really like blood either, but most of the time, she has no choice but to face it.

Mmm... Okay... I think this looks good. Powers : she has one power, and it’s to erase memories. She doesn’t control it at all. Theoretically, she should be able to chose which memory she wants to delete, but when she tried it, she felt like she would destroy every memory the person had. And since she’s never trying to, she isn’t getting better at it. Moreover, to do that, she needs to hold firmly the person’s head in her hands. Not very useful during a fight… She actually did it, once, on a men who attacked her in a street. Trying to defend herself and to push him away, she grabbed his head, and suddenly, she felt everything he knew. And she destroyed it. He backed up screaming. He didn’t even know how to speak, and he fell on the ground, because he couldn’t walk either. He looked like a baby who’s breathing for the first time. People said he had lost his mind, later on, and he was taken to a hospital. Jane feels horribly guilty… For not feeling guilty about it. Whenever she thinks about it, she just feels the rage and fear that ran through her at that time. And even if she believes what she did was awful, she doesn’t feel bad about it either.

That’s a pretty awesome power, but again, still not sure about the whole river gives life to demigod, so yeah... I still really like the concept of it, though! Relationships : - Her father : His name is John Smith, and Lethe probably fell in love with him because of how normal he was. He loves movies from Judd Apatow or the Farelly brothers, and has surprising tastes. He can be a bit annoying, but when he talks about things he likes, he becomes very interesting. He’s the reason why Jane truly believes everybody matters, and everybody can surprise you if you pay attention to them long enough. He never forgot her. Never. Jane will « disappear » after his death. She was 26 when he died, and he was 70.

Pretty sure Lethe is still a river. Lethe became a river a lonnnnggggggg time ago. They don’t exactly have a human form at this day and age, I believe.     - A demigod named Mary, who was a daughter of Demeter. They became really close friends when Jane first went to the camp. Mary is a very nice girl. She’s bubbly, and is a little overweight. She’s really adorable, always smiling and always trying to comfort everyone. She really helped Jane, and made her feel much better. When Jane will come back, a year later, she’ll go to see Mary, very happy to see her again, because she really missed her. And Mary will look very confused and ask her who she is… After that, Jane will never try to get close of Mary again.     - A demigod, named Lucy, daughter of Hecate, who thinks that Jane is « interesting ». She’s trying to find a magical way to free Jane from this curse, the fact that she’s always forgotten. Lucy doesn’t always remember her very well, but because of this, she writes down or record, every day, what they’re doing together. Jane really likes her and appreciates what she’s doing for her, but she feels that she’s too much like an experiment to Lucy to say that they are really friend. They do talk a lot, still, and Lucy would say that they’re friends.     - Another son of Hecate, Henry. He, like Lucy, is trying to free her from this curse, and he’s always fighting with Lucy on how to it. He’s very smart, and is always wiping his glasses. He enjoys talking to Jane, and she really likes him. They’re good friends, but, when Lucy and Jane talk about rather personal things, Henry and jane talk about their tastes, which movies they’ve seen, etc. Jane really cares about him. She will miss him a lot after changing her life, and she will always feel like they could have been more than friends.     - She doesn’t like Piper, for the reasons I’ve stated. During her « trip » with her, she will come to admire her, but they will never get very close, because Piper guessed that Jane wasn’t her biggest fan. Things are always a little awkward between them.     - She doesn’t know what to think about Jason nor Frank. She finds them scary and intimidating. She believes they’re nice persons, still, but she will never have a proper talk with them. The boys think she’s a nice girl, but don’t really know what to do in front of her. Jason knows that she doesn’t like Piper and doesn’t specially want to get closer of her. She probably could become a friend of Frank, but it won’t happen. Frank probably isn’t paying enough attention to her, and since she’s afraid of him, she’s not doing anything to get closer of him either.     - She will become a friend from Hazel. Though they don’t really know why, those girls feel very comfortable with each other. Jane will miss her as well when she will go away. Hazel is always very worried about Jane, she feels like Jane needs to be protected all the time. She’s not completely wrong about it… Hazel will be very helpful with everything Jane will go through, and Jane keeps feeling like  she’s taking and not giving anything. Their friendship is a bit unbalanced because of that.     - She would really like to get closer of Nico, since she really believes he’s interesting, but he will never let her a chance. And since she’s not very good to do this anyway, she will never succeed doing it. Nico, on the other hand, thinks that she’s not interesting. Still, he was one of the first person, if not the first, to notice her and to talk to her at the Camp. She wasn’t very afraid of him, but she can’t help, sometimes, to feel like he could do horrible things.     - Well, she will fall in love with Leo. She thinks he’s very funny, and a nice person, which is very important to him. She also likes how he’s not gifted with everything, like Percy or Jason, but is trying to make the best out of everything he has. He will start liking her as well, because she always seem to care and to worry about him. She always laugh to his jokes as well, and they will have sort of a relationship, until he goes to Ogygia.     - She used to have a crush on Percy, and she still have tender feelings about him. She thought Percy was cute and, well, he talked to her. She was never really « in love » with him, but she liked to picture him with her. When he started dating Annabeth, she tried to get rid of that feeling, and it was easy since they never talk or anything. Even if he can remember her, he will never give her any real attention. It’s not to be mean or anything, it’s just… He doesn’t notice her.

~*FINAL VERDICT*~

Okay, so...

I really think you should make her into a nymph. I’ve read other Rick Riordian books and I’ve seen nymphs from the underworld rather than demigods (I don’t think I’ve have even found a demigod that claims to be born from the rivers). I could be wrong, but the legitimacy has to be there. Fantasy or not, it’s gotta work with the mythology rules itself.

Another thing, that whole people can’t remember her thing... Interesting concept, but it doesn’t exactly fit with the whole premise of the fandom, I feel... It feels like she’s been dumped with the mist so that people can’t see her. If you plan to use this OC for rping purposes, I suggest you take that factor out of her and replace with a similar but less potent attribute. 

In all honesty, I really like the concept and idea you had for this OC! It’s just... It doesn’t exactly fit nor tie together the same myths as the actual stories either. 

I hope that helps you improve your OC! I like her, but to fit her within the frame of PJO, she’s gotta change.

~Vixel